So here I am, staring down 45. It feels both significant and entirely ordinary. The memory of my 40th is hazy – a milestone that passed without much fanfare when I felt particularly burned out. Sometimes the universe has other plans for our celebrations.
Missing out on a proper 40th celebration taught me something unexpected: those big milestone moments aren’t really what it’s all about. Don’t get me wrong – I love a good party like the next guy. But these past few years have shown me that finding satisfaction in random Tuesday afternoons is where the real magic happens. Like successfully explaining a complex work concept to someone who finally gets it, or just sitting in my office with my cat refusing to let me move because apparently my lap is the only acceptable napping spot in the entire house.
Speaking of work – man, what a journey that’s been. I used to think being good at my job meant doing everything myself. It turns out that being good at it means knowing when to step back and let others take the wheel. These days, I’m less about being the guy who knows everything and more about being the guy who helps others figure things out. Sure, it’s made me a better manager, but it’s also made me a better dad. Funny how that works.
Setting boundaries has been huge. Learning to say “no” at work without feeling guilty about it? That’s the kind of superpower they should teach in school. Because at the end of the day, what matters more – another late-night meeting or being there to watch your kid’s game? Sometimes, they make that decision easier by being grumpy teens and pre-teens who insist they don’t want you there anyway.
I’ve been rediscovering poetry lately, which probably sounds pretentious as hell, but something about the economy of words just feels right. Some days it’s a bear market – every word feels overvalued, bloated with meaning. Other days, it’s a bull run – the words practically invest themselves, paying dividends unexpectedly. Maybe it’s because everything else in life demands such verbose explanation, but poetry lets you trade in the currency of pure meaning.
Now, about health… look, I know I should be doing more. The dad bod isn’t getting any dad-ier. But I’m drinking more water now (my kidneys send their thanks), and I’ve actually started getting decent sleep instead of doomscrolling until 2 AM. Baby steps, right? At least I can say I haven’t touched a cigarette in over 15 years. Sometimes I still dream about smoking – that acrid comfort of a past life – but then I wake up, take a deep breath of clean air, and remember that not smelling like a walking Mad Men episode is actually pretty nice.
I’ve been trying to be more intentional about where I put my attention and resources. The news cycle is like that friend who only calls to complain – at some point, you have to start letting it go to voicemail. Instead, I’m focusing on actions that might actually move the needle: supporting causes that matter, remembering that local elections impact daily life more than viral tweets, and teaching my kids that change starts with showing up – especially at the ballot box.
The kids, though – they’re something else. Watching them grow into incredible people with their own thoughts, humor, and personalities is like watching the best show ever made, except you can’t binge-watch it. Every day brings new plot twists: sudden interests in obscure topics, passionate arguments about the most random things, and moments of surprising wisdom followed by baffling decisions. They’re writing their own stories now, and I’m just grateful to be part of the supporting cast.
My wife continues to be the steady presence that makes everything else possible. She got me Chicago favorites for my birthday because she knows exactly who I am and what makes me happy. An Italian beef bar and Lou Malnati’s pizzas? That’s love right there.
Then there’s Kristin – friend, business partner, and fellow adventurer in our great LLC experiment. We’re building something interesting, and even if I’m not entirely sure what it’ll become, I’m excited to find out. It’s like starting a new game without reading the tutorial – terrifying but thrilling.
At Acadia, I’ve found opportunities to grow in unexpected ways. Being on a podcast felt surreal (in a good way), and my connections with colleagues and clients have been genuinely rewarding. It’s about the real relationships built, not the digital metrics of success.
Looking ahead, well, I want to take better care of myself, obviously. I want to get more physically active, share more of my creative side, keep learning, keep reading, and keep trying to be present for the people who matter.
To anyone reading this – maybe you’re approaching a milestone birthday too, or maybe you’re just procrastinating during a meeting (no judgment). Either way, I’d love to hear your thoughts. What are you learning? What surprises you? What makes your random Tuesdays worthwhile?
I’ll leave you with an Irish saying that feels right: “May the best of your past be the worst of your future.” Here’s to 45, to the year behind, and to whatever comes next.